Grab Hold of the Raft

Tonight by Jeremy Camp

In this time, I know I need to be more broken.
Then I find, I feel this passion grow, to face all that's been lost.
It's not too late to give control now.  I don't know why I wait, 

You're always calling me.

Tonight, I will take my cross.  Tonight I will count the cost.
Tonight, I realize to take hold of  this very moment.

In this time, You draw me by these words You've spoken.
I feel inside, this neverending hope. 

I've placed all that I trust in knowing one day I will see You.  

The only thing worth holding onto is holding onto me.
I will take this moment.  And I feel that it's closer.  

And I kneel to show You this desperate heart of mine.

It's time.  I have spent almost seven years searching for how to hear God speak to me.  This weekend I attended a leadership training for MOPS that has changed how I think about hearing from God.  One of the speakers said it is time to stop listening for the whispers from God and start paying attention to the echo He is sending me each and every day.  I wait and search for how He is speaking to me, but each day I miss how He is echoing His unquenchable love for me.  He loves me more than I could ever love anyone or anything.  He loves me beyond reason and beyond comprehension.  He loves me beyond the heights and depths, beyond the sky and further than the wind blows.  Why? Is this really a question I deserve to ask?  I have to say no.  I deserve punishment and restitution, but He chose to sacrifice His Son and His Son chose to come and be punished and beat and treated as a criminal so that I could reach a Father who loves me more than I deserve and cares more than I will ever comprehend.  I am desperate to know the love of our Savior and am ever searching for the reason.  The reason is because He loves me.  What more do I need to know?  God's Word tells us our hearts will never understand and yet I waste so much God-given time wondering why and attempting to figure it out.  He just wants my heart.  

He poured out His love for me through the blood of His Son.  He took on all my trash and never questioned my motives.  He knew what a mess I would be and yet He loves me anyways.  What do I want?  What do I need?  Nothing more than I already have.  I must make the choice to accept it.  Accept the love of my Savior and take hold of what is already mine...